I don't know how else to describe how I've felt the last few days except just that- a heavy, yet thankful heart. I've noticed on a lot of friends blogs lately there seems to be a common theme of "perspective". How do we keep perspective and live in the moment? How do we get past the stress and chaos of life with little kids and learn to enjoy each stage and the time we have with them? I know you can't always live in fear of tomorrow being the end, but what if it was?
A childhood friend lost her little 5 year old girl this week to a rare brainstem tumor. They had a short 10 1/2 months from when she was diagnosed until she passed away. My heart aches for them. I can't even imagine how they are feeling and what they are going through. Yet, it makes me thankful for my two healthy kids that are fast asleep in their beds tonight.
I was getting Ashlyn ready for bed tonight and I told her she could pick out three books we could read. She picked the books, "Guess How Much I Love You" and "I'll Love You Forever". Talk about a tug at the heart strings. I wanted to somehow take a snapshot of the moment so I could remember it forever. She snuggled up right next to me and everytime I would read the part in the book that says,
"I'll love you Forever
I'll like you for Always
As long as I'm living
My baby you'll be."
She would say it along with me and then look at me and smile. How grateful I am to have these moments with my kids, and how grateful I am to be a mother- to be able to love and be loved so much.
Also this week an instructor I teach with at the gym lost her husband very unexpectedly. He was healthy last week and then came down with symptoms of the flu on Thursday and passed away Monday night- so tragic. I think one of my greatest fears in life is loosing Brad or one of my kids. This weighed so heavy on my mind/heart as I heard the news yesterday I couldn't stop thinking about it. I don't think you are every really "prepared" for something that tragic, but again it comes back to the beginning. What is my perspective/priorities in life? Am I living each day to its fullest and making sure those I love know I love them? Or am I just going through the motions of my every day sometimes mundane life? I really hope I can try harder to show Brad how much I love him, and listen to the needs of my kids and spend quality time with them because I really do love them so much.
Oven Baked Buttermilk Chicken with Gravy
3 days ago
5 comments:
Thanks for the post almost every night I feel like I could be a better person.
Well, you brought tears to my eyes. Thankyou for that post. It is so hard to not get caught up in daily life and struggles. I need to remember to cherish every day.
Thanks Heidi, i'm getting off the computer right now to play with my kids!!
Love you Michelle...you made me cry.
Heid-
I have been thinking along these lines a lot latley, also. I hear tragic stories all of the time from Greg (comes with the profession) but, losing a spouse or a child is my nightmare above all nightmares. Thanks for the post, it choked me up a bit.
Also, I heard about their little girl, so sad. She was in preschool with Rachs boys, and they have kept on how she was doing all along. Prayers need to be sent their way, thanks for the reminder :)
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